I am not so good with writing my thoughts or even communicating them verbally. It is something that causes me great frustration especially when I feel things so strongly but lack the ability to deliver the words I feel with power. This is most definately a struggle I face as I long to be an effective teacher, NEVERTHELESS(I love this word!), I continue trying and hope that through the Lord's help, my desire, and continued effort, good things will come. I've been debating all day as to whether or not to share an experience I had today and have come to the conclusion that it is worth sharing. Please bear with my weakness of clear expression!
Today I attended the funeral of a friend. Her name is Jo Voss and she was 78 years old. I have known Jo for several years and she is one that I have felt a strong kinship towards. Whenever she would see me or I her we would embrace and she would lift my spirits by speaking kind words about me or my family. On several occasions Jo would call me to ask for a ride. She was always concerned about it being an inconvience but I always felt honored when the call would come. I remember not too long ago I was giving her a ride and the conversation turned, as it usually did, to what was going on in my life and the lives of my children. I had shared with her the fact that I was struggling with recurring back pain and that it had been so hard for me to keep up with all the activities of my family. She was so sympathetic and listened intently as I shared with her the fear I felt as I worried over the fact that this trial may be something I would struggle with for the rest of my life. Each time after that, Jo would always ask about my back and I would give her my report as to how I was doing.
Jo's own health has not been good. I have not ever seen Jo walk without her walker. I had asked her on occasion how her own health was and she would say(with a chuckle), "Oh, I'm hanging in there!" At times I could see that it was not going so well but she always had a smile and a hug and words telling me that she was doing alright. I always just thought that Jo was showing the signs of getting old...you know how the body just starts to get tired and things don't work as well as they used too! Well the last time I saw Jo I could see a definate difference in her appearance. She had lost quite a bit of weight and in a very short time too. I put my arms around her and asked if she was okay and she told me that she just didn't feel like eating much lately but that she was going to get it figured out and she was going to be okay. That was the last conversation I had with her.
Today I learned something I never knew and here is where I learned a great lesson. Jo had been fighting cancer for years! I never had any idea that she was facing such a trial...she never let it show! As I listened to her life story, I reflected on the conversations I had had with Jo. I saw my own trial of back pain in a much smaller light. I am somewhat embarressed inside over how self-centered I am and how I tend to focus too much on the problems I am facing. I have been thinking all day about this wonderful trait my friend Jo had, her ability to turn outside of herself, even in a most trying time. Jo suffered much but never let that suffering become who she was or become all consuming that she couldn't focus on others. Looking at her, now knowing what I know, I see that it strengthened her and probably helped ease the pain she had to be experiencing.
I see in her many characteristics of the Savior. President Grant Walton spoke of the specific trait of enduring with compassion. He pointed out so well the fact that while Jesus hung on the cross, in His agony He remembered those hanging next to Him and He remembered those kneeling at His feet. He did all He could at that moment to comfort those around Him. Today I saw how well Jo did the same for me!
I don't want this to be a forgotten lesson! I am going to try much harder to develop this characteristic that my friend Jo had which is a characteristic of the Savior! As Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin taught at the last General Conference, "Come what may and LOVE IT!" I'm so thankful for having known Jo Voss, I will miss her and it is with a heart full of gratitude that I share what I learned from her, with you!
